I’m not trying to complain about anything just trying to get things straight in my mind. (Because not complaining is rule #1 here – I have to keep reminding myself that some days.) This is more about me working through my issues than complaining. I hope it helps anyone else who is battling the same issues.
My life, like most people’s lives, are very busy. Finding time for everything, even allowing “down time”, is a challenge on the best of days. After hitting a big birthday, I have given my life a lot of thought and what I still want to accomplish. There are still so many things I want to do and I do feel that I am in my “prime” so I know I can do it all. I’m just having problems with figuring out how to do it all without ending up in the hospital with exhaustion. I know I need my down time, usually sitting in front of the TV and sometimes knitting, but I need to figure out the best way to get the most out of my day.
My day job is unique. I sometimes have down time and sometimes I don’t. It’s completely unpredictable from day to day or week to week. I love my job and I love being busy but there are times where times between my clients feel that they are too short to get anything accomplished so I end up on Facebook or doing something equally thought as a “time suck”.
Self-discipline I think is the issue. I goof around on the internet or whatever instead of doing a bit of work that will move me forward in my big goals in life. Am I so accustomed to instant gratification that is holding me back? How do I keep myself accountable for it all? I have amazing ideas but how do I put them into action?
I know part of it all is fear. Fear of failure. If you don’t try, you won’t fail. I’ve gotten comfortable with my life and maybe I need to shake it up a bit more. The “Scary Book” was a great idea but lately, all that has really be recorded in it are the books I’ve read and movies I’ve seen. Where is the thrill of looking my fear in the eye? That was the entire point of the book in the first place.
So here’s what’s going on in my life, in no particular order but what is falling out of my head:
- Finishing my degree so I can go to Grad School in the fall.
- Moving my writing career further
- Staying creative and producing quality work.
- Time with my family – which is really much higher on the list but it’s all a balancing act.
- Time for myself – mind and body.
I feel like I am on the cusp of greatness but I don’t want to fail. I know I need to take risks to gain awesomeness but failing really does suck!
Does anyone have any brilliant ideas of how I can organize my life and get some kind of self discipline, I’d love any comments or ideas on how to do this. Heck, if it works, I’ll let you name one of my main characters in an upcoming book. How’s that for incentive!!!